Usagi Sucks at Phone Sex
by sugabears
Summary: I wrote this story after I saw someone's avatar with this title and thought it would be so funny if Misaki could do this better than Usagi, since he is supposed to be the more "experienced" one.


Usagi Sucks at Phone Sex

"Usagi-san, it's getting late. I still have studying to do."

"But I haven't seen you all day Misaki, I miss you."

Usagi was staying the night at the Teito Hotel as Aikawa had _casually _persuaded him to attend a weekend-long meeting for the publishing company. Usagi had wanted Misaki to come with him again but Misaki had told him that he had studying to do and would get more done at home than at a hotel and (when that didn't seem like enough to keep Usagi's hands off him) he told him he didn't want to disappoint Takahiro by failing his test. That finally got through Usagi's thick skull and he agreed to let Misaki stay alone this weekend only if he promised not to leave the apartment or have anyone over. Of course Misaki thought Usagi-san was being ridiculous but he agreed so that Usagi would go to work.

Misaki was pretty proud of the work he'd already accomplished and was just finishing his supper dishes when the phone rang and was now trying to get rid of Usagi so he could continue studying.

"You saw me this morning when you left."

"And now I miss you. How will I survive until tomorrow evening?"

"How about you go to bed?" replied Misaki, getting annoyed now.

"That wasn't nice Misaki. Oh, I know what's wrong. You're getting depressed without me there aren't you? You want me there to touch you like I always do."

"What?! No! That's not it at all! Idiot!"

"Ah Misaki, I know you too well. If I were there I could make you feel better. How about we pretend I'm there now."

"What do you mean?"

"Let's have phone sex."

"Are you crazy?! Absolutely not!"

"Come on. I'm sure it would put you at ease and make you relax so you can go back to studying."

"What? No! Well…"

"And you want to do well on your test to make Takahiro proud right?" said Usagi, using Misaki's own excuse back at him.

"Umm…" _Maybe it would be alright. I could use a break from studying I guess._ _Usagi always does make me feel good_ (not that I would ever tell him that.) "O-ok, what do we do?"

"Mmm, alright Misaki, lay back. I'll take care of you."

Misaki blushed but did as he was told and lay with his back against the armrest of the couch. "Ok."

"Now I'll kiss your lips and then I'll kiss your ears, then I'll unbutton your shirt and kiss your neck, then I'll touch your…"

Misaki took the phone away from his ear and looked at it. _This was phone sex?_ _I thought it was supposed to be, I don't know, arousing. Usagi sounded like he was a teacher in class reciting boring dates and times._ He put the phone back to his ear and sure enough, Usagi was still rhyming off his monologue. It kind of reminded Misaki of that American cartoon, _what was it again? With the kids and the adults who didn't say words, only a sort or mumbling sound? Oh yeah! Charlie Brown! _

"Pffftt…" Misaki let out a muffled laugh.

"What was that?" asked Usagi-san, breaking out of his recitation.

"N-nothing," said Misaki, trying to hold in his laugh.

"Are you laughing at me?" asked a none-too-pleased Usagi.

"I'm sorry Usagi-san, but, you kinda suck at this."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know, it's like you're reading off a list or something, not what you'd do with me if we were actually together right now."

"Alright then Smarty-pants, how should I be speaking?"

Misaki sighed, "I don't know, something like 'Oh Misaki, I'm gonna make you feel so good.' And I'd say 'How? What are you going to do?' And you'd say 'How about I suck your cock. Would you like that?' And I'd say 'O-ok' 'Oh Misaki, you're getting so hard. Does it feel good when I swallow all of you?' 'Y-yeah' 'How about when I fondle your balls?' 'Mmm' 'Yeah you like that don't you Misaki. I'm going to prep you now ok?' 'Nh…' 'Misaki, you're so tight and hot' 'Ah! Usagi-san!'"

Usagi's eyes popped open hearing his lover moan like that. He was shocked that those words had come out of Misaki's mouth. They were very arousing and, he realized with a bit of distain, he had sucked at trying to seduce Misaki with phone sex. "What are you doing now Misaki?" he quickly asked, not wanting Misaki to stop.

"Umm…I'm stroking myself."

"Yeah? What else? Are you imagining it's me doing it to you?" asked Usagi as he sat back on his hotel bed and unzipped his pants to take his semi-erection in hand.

"Mmm, yeah. But my hands are too warm." Misaki blushed as he thought about Usagi's big cold hands. Usagi chuckled at that, "You have to use your imagination. Go on, you were doing great before. What next?"

"Umm, well, next you would, uh…" Misaki stuttered, he knew what Usagi would do next but couldn't voice it out loud.

"What Misaki? You already said it, say it again. Would I prep you now? Push in one finger into that sweet little opening, then another and push in and out?"

"Mm, yeah."

"Are you doing it Misaki? Are you following what I'm saying?"

Misaki blushed deeper and pressed a finger to his opening. "Nh, yes."

"Good. Oh Misaki you're so great. How does it feel?"

"Um, warm."

"Yeah I bet. How about I pump your cock again, ok?"

"O-ok," he said and removed his finger from his opening to begin pumping his erection again. "What about you Usagi-san? What are you doing?"

"You mean 'what are you doing to me?'" Usagi smirked into the phone as he softly rubbed his cock to keep it from going soft.

"Umm… I don't know, I guess I'll pump your cock too?"

"Ok, we'll do it together. Sound good?"

"Mm-hmm," Misaki agreed and continued his attack on his erection, pretending Usagi was right there with him. It helped hearing his breathing from the phone right next to his ear. "How are you doing Misaki? Good?"

"Y-yeah. You?"

"Yeah, I love when you jerk me off Misaki."

"Nh…"

"Are you close?"

"Yeah. Ah Usagi-san!"

"Mm, Misaki, cum with me please."

"Yeah, yes! Usagi san!"

"Ah! Misaki!" They both called out as they came together, breathing deeply into their phones; into each other's ears.

"You ok Misaki?"

"Yeah. Was, was it good for you?"

"Yes, extremely. How about you?"

"Mm-hmm."

"You really were good at this Misaki, I'm impressed."

"Shut up!"

"I'm serious, I might use what you said in my next novel. How did you start off again?"

"Shut up! Idiot! Don't use me for your perverted-ness anymore!"

"Misaki, don't you know that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?"

"Not for porn!"

And so they continued their argument deep into the night, Usagi secretly writing down Misaki's sexy words onto a hotel notepad and Misaki, even though he was annoyed at his lover's outspokenness, had to admit that he secretly did like hearing Usagi-san whisper those words to him through the phone, after he had stopped sucking of course.


End file.
